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The Prosecution: Beth

Sometimes she films me while having a meal. I’ll see myself on her social media – it’s like a jumpscare.

A close companion of 10 years, Marielle, labels herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to record everything all the time. When we eat out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when other people see her posing or filming – I get secondhand embarrassment. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She creates video blogs about living in our city, a day in her life, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be involved. Sometimes she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a surprise: I might be no makeup on, making a strange expression or be captured mid-bite. It’s uncomfortable.

She also expects me to record her at inopportune moments. Sometimes I’ll be talking to another person, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my unease about the situation, she brushed it off. She’s taken me to a couple of brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the time and effort I spend helping her make content.

I appreciate that she has supported me with my career in design, but I resist our friendship to become just a ledger of favours. I don’t feel she's insincere or inauthentic, but sometimes it seems that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me laughing with someone. It feels forced. It's crucial her to understand that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy being with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being recorded, edited, or shared for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her Instagram.

The Other Side: Marielle

I hope Beth to see that the content we produce together can get us a foot in the door.

I love creating videos. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online enables me to show my personality and engage with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a professional creator yet, but it’s smart to make money from your passions. I admire people on TikTok who pull off that aesthetic of informal, self-made content creation.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: observing the details, sharing them with an viewership that values the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my way of offering access, providing her a opportunity to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That’s not blackmail, it's simply being realistic.

I’d still take her to such functions even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see what the content we make together can achieve: an opening. I understand not all people likes being filmed, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes material authentic. Being recorded occasionally is an inherent aspect of being my companion. I'd remove anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anyone to be my personal filmmaker, but companions support one another in minor capacities. My assumption was filming a clip here or there would be enjoyable for her. Innovation thrives in partnership, and having Beth around makes projects energetic and pleasurable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never deliberately humiliate her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I cherish our friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to come between us. I’m willing to compromise: like requesting permission before recording, and steering clear of shots that might make her self-conscious.

This is not about power, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still considering hers. Obviously making content is not a substitute for real connection: it’s just part of how I experience life and I desire her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more excruciating than having a companion film you. I get that it's her job, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Perhaps she can find influencer friends to collaborate with. Given the dark, looming future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something professionally, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have helped previously. While she enjoys creating, that doesn't imply all those around her is content. She needs to respect Beth’s personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love making content and showing off her life online, but it isn't for everybody. It was kind she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Create some real memories, where genuine feelings are preserved, not digital scrapbooks. In fact, celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more secrecy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be not fully engaged nor authentic when they're together – she's on the job. Both seem unsure as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to change one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an acceptable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: has she been exploiting their bond?